Sunday, September 1, 2013

Oh god, I'm the same age as Miley Cyrus...

I didn't want to talk about it, but since everyone is talking about it, and I like to jump on wagons more than I like jumping on castles, I'm going to talk about it too.

Firstly, Miley is about 1 month older than I. So technically we are of the same age group.

This makes me happy because: I could theoretically become Maxim's no.1 hottest lady of 2013 (Seriously how did she get voted that?); I am living a happier, less shameful life; I discovered I had a long tongue ages before her and therefore learnt to keep it in my mouth lest I be called a whore; and finally, since I'm writing this on Father's Day, I still have my Dad's love and respect.

However, I am disappointed because: She is not only representing my generation, but also my exact gender group, age group and race (badly); I could be presenting a less radical stereotyped Disney failure role-model than she is currently portraying; and finally because I think she could have been a less extreme version of herself if she hadn't chosen to go the crazy route. Under different circumstances she could have been a cool person to hang out with.

Just look at that mess. What happened to you Miley? Oh right, you were brought up in the limelight, had a singular image forced upon you, and then when you tried to show everyone you were more than just Hannah Montana, you went a little bit too far. Happens to everyone.

But why do young people think that by acting gangsta, whorish, and just plain crazy they will somehow convince everyone to see them as a new person? I get that she was having fun at the VMA's, I probably would have done something similar to that mash up, but why not wear some white clothes like the girls in the video? They weren't all naked . . . not in the censored version anyway.


I don't even want to get into this. It makes me sad. What's worse is all the attention people like this get just for doing something outlandish. (I realise the irony of this as I myself am giving her attention with this post) But there is a difference between doing something outlandish for attention, and doing it to be artistic and promote image. Lady Gaga does this stuff for art. You don't see her getting naked for publicity. Well . . . ah . . . she does things differently, more artistic and controlled. And her shows are awesome.

But Miley, don't just shave your head, wear revealing clothes and start going crazy. You're a country American white girl who has only just gotten out of puberty. You don't need to start showing off your body. Good for you, you have a tattoo, that's cool. Lot's of people have tattoos. You also have a slender physique with nice skin; double good for you. But for the love of god just calm the f**k down! We already have one jackass lesbian looking white wanna-be-gansta singer from our generation. It's not nice to copy.

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